Peter is so flippin' hilarious

My husband does not enjoy giving his opinion on my wardrobe, my hair, my shoes, or my lipstick color. Maybe he feels cornered. Perhaps he doesn't want to offend me. He simply exudes a gushing, flattering response just to get past these types of questions as quickly as possible. For example: "Oh yes, yes, that skirt is sooooo flattering honey!"...with his eyes turned toward the tv... You get the idea.
This morning, I tried a new "do" (which is actually sort of my old "do") by flipping my hair out instead of under in the traditional A-line. My hair is getting long and I'm at that critical decision point, keep growing it out or cut it short again in the A-line. So, I naively thought I'd ask the Pete, since there's no one else around the apartment at 8am... he was dozing on the couch after an early gym visit. "Peter, give me your honest opinion- do you like the flippies or do you prefer it under, like before, in the A-line?" Peter (with one eye opened): "Oh yes, it looks wonderful like that; I love the A-line." ? A: "which one do you like better, A-line or flippies?" P (other eye opened): oh yes, such nice, nice hair!" A: "Nevermind. You don't know what an A-line is, do you Peter?" P: "Hmmm....such nice hair! So pretty!" I had wasted 5 minutes of both of our time.
Then, this afternoon, he sends me a goofy text message: "Did I tell you how beautiful you looked this morning? I mean, how can I slumber when the flippies look so smoking? It revvs my engine, its flippin hot!" I smiled. And laughed. out loud.
The thing with Peter is he just doesn't spend a lot of time on his hair or his clothes and his personal opinion is that "women" shouldn't spend so much time obsessing about their appearances, that we are encumbered about with trivial things. So, he doesn't want to encourage me or others in our vanity. Its not that he doesn't care. And deep down, he knows what I really want more than anything is a good chuckle. This, he delivers everytime.
So, does anyone else think my husband is beyond hilarious? Or is it just me? I'm still laughing.

Swan Lake

Unexpectedly, I got the invitation to attend Swan Lake last night at the Lincoln Center. The gal whose ticket I snagged had a sick baby, so she needed to stay home with him. Poor baby, lucky me! We had 4th tier seats, row N, but the view was still quite good. Girls Night Out! It was a mesmerizing production to say the least. And Peter, the birthday boy? He stayed home to check Facebook and email, responding to all of the birthday wishes. He was content, he says, because he got some indexing done (family history), plus he doesn't like cake.

Visiting Teachers

I'm kinda bugged lately. At my so-called visiting teachers. They never come. They never write. They don't even say hello to me sometimes at RS events or at church. Six weeks ago one of them approached me and apologized for not doing anything with VT, but it was an awkward exchange because I think she almost wanted me to make her feel better for neglecting me and her assignment. "Oh Allison, I'm your VT. And I feel so bad because we haven't ever visited you."
What am I supposed to say to that - "oh, thats okay. Don't worry about it. Don't feel bad...."
The truth is, she should feel bad! Its an important job. Everyone needs a shepherd. I know, I know, I can be an idealist and its hard not to expect that from others. Honestly, I'm a pretty good visiting teacher. I write cards, I visit every other month. I make cookies. I babysit. I say hello at church and RS events and sincerely try to create a caring friendship. I even threw a baby shower for someone I vt'd last year. Sigh....
Part of my frustration is that right now in my life I really need visiting teachers. I'm still relatively new in the ward, I've got no family in the vicinity, I'm not a part of the young mom club (75% of the RS), and I'll be moving soon. It'd be wonderful to feel cared about, overtly included, to have help moving, and to have visitors at least every other month to share a spiritual message. I guess not this time around... my task now is to not resent the situation and to let it go.
Like Peter says, many people suffer from failed perfectionism. They think they have to do something perfectly or they won't do it at all (visiting every month). So, instead of saying hello or dropping me a simple email or a card, they don't do anything. And everytime they see me, they feel guilty and anxious because I'm a reminder of their neglect. As opposed to feeling warmth, friendship and kindness.
My apologies if I sound harsh, critical or judgmental. I just wish my visiting teachers recognized how much I need them. This whole situation is helping me to be aware of the fact that everyone needs visiting teachers and that the program is inspired!!! AARGH!!! or should I say AMEN!
What are your thoughts and experiences with VT?

News of the Decade!

Dr. Nelson has been accepted as a resident into the Oral & Maxillofacial Surgery Program at Westchester Medical Center in Valhalla, NY (about 40 miles north of Manhattan). He begins the program on July 1, 2011, and we will be moving up there towards the end of June. We are thrilled. Peter has paid a very steep price to follow his dream of becoming an oral surgeon. A few of his colleagues have not yet been accepted into OMFS programs even after internships and other similar grunt work as GPR's (general practice residency - one year positions in hospitals as dentists). So, we are very grateful and very blessed. The best part about this whole thing is that 1. Allison gets to quit her job and 2. she gets to own a puppy! Westchester is a more affordable place to live with more wide open spaces. We'll have to buy a car, of course, so its ironic that we just got rid of ours a year ago. After four years of dental school, two years of internship, and the upcoming four years of residency, this is truly the news of the decade! Congratulations Peter on all of your hard work, dedication and persistence. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. :)

The Joy Monster

Last night Peter exclaimed aloud, "this family history indexing is really bringing a lot of joy into my life!" Is that an adorable quotable or what!? He's been online frequently this past month, indexing names and learning everything about his new calling - Family History Coordinator/Supervisor. He has three people he coordinates with, trains, and "supervises," in addition to working with the family history missionaries in our ward. He is planning a training meeting next week, but plans on working one on one with new members or anyone who is interested. His biggest accomplishment to date? Getting ME signed up to index names! I enjoyed it as well, and hope to lend some reconnaissance to deciphering Italian, French and Spanish surnames from the Census. There's even a point system for indexers: so far I have one point and Peter has 300. Thus, he currently has more joy than me. Watch out - as he'll be contacting you soon!

MLK Day

Six years ago on MLK Day, Peter came to AZ to visit me to check out the "love connection," as we'd been emailing for months and hadn't seen each other in almost 5 years. We hiked Camelback Mountain in Scottsdale. It was unseasonably hot - a record temp of 81 degrees (in January!?) The heat must have sped things up because we ended up having our first kiss atop the mountain. Peter's still embarrassed that it happened publicly. Ah, the memories. It was a perfect day.

This year our definition of a near perfect MLK Day is a bit different: We slept in, went to the gym, attended a waffle brunch and pigged out (amazing syrup recipe below), then Peter took a nap while I watched a BBC mini-series (highly recommended: Berkeley Square, 1998), then we took a walk, went to a birthday party, walked home, ate some supper and I finished watching my mini series until late while Peter was on line. Fabulous! :) How was your holiday?

Marcus Bowers amazingly sinful syrup recipe:

1 cup buttermilk

1 cup sugar

1 cup butter

Bring these three to a boil, then add 1/2 tsp. baking soda + 1 tsp vanilla; stir

Voila!

More Mama Mary pics...